I Didn't Win the Lottery, Again

I haven’t won the lottery again. I don’t know for sure, but I’m pretty sure. Yeah, I’m pretty sure I haven’t won the lottery, again.

I hold out. Stretch out the dream, as it were. I’ll buy a ticket, and then just wait…extending the daydream. What if I did win? But I know that I won’t. I’m reasonably optimistic, but I never win these damn things.

But what if I did? I’d finish this house the way I want to, and then build my dream home (I’ve been building that baby for years, every time I have insomnia, which is often.). The big question is whether the dream home would be in Wisconsin or Michigan? If the winnings were big enough maybe I’d do both. Even if I could only do one my plan is to leave it, and a trust, so that it can become an artists’ retreat for the unschooled artists like me. I’d give our local library a new wing, and the La Crosse library, where I spent so much of my youth, a hefty donation as well.

I spoke with my mom once, about the what if’s. I told her I’d finally be able to pay back all the money I’ve borrowed over the years…she said that she thought a million would cover it, ha, ha!! Don’t know if I’d give my brother any money…haven’t heard from him lately, and we aren’t close. His wife is fabulous, but if I gave him money then she might just divorce him and take half, and I have to take care of family, just on principle. So no, no money for my brother – he’s better off with the fabulous wife.

B&C I’d make millionaires, but, being communists, they’d probably give most of it away. Well hell, that’s their prerogative, I’ll just have to give them more to cover for the charity. And E&B, I’d help them out of their current, unexpected hole. And C’s brother E, I’d take care of him too, if I could figure out how to get around the FBI. And what a joy for me, to finally be able to pay all of my bills, in full!

I think, aside from the dream house (and a trust set up purely to pay property taxes, etc.), that I would end up just as broke as I am now, were I to win the lottery, which I won’t.

Just checked. Nope, I didn’t win the lottery, again. Damn. Not even one number.